I don’t blame you. You were raised by parents who also didn’t understand, as were their parents and so on. I am just the latest incarnation of our lineage; the best and worst of both sides.
And I understand you just didn’t know. No one knew or seemed to care. There were so many other things to worry about then. It just wasn’t part of your consciousness. And with half my life gone, most of it without true self love, I now understand how very important it is to living a positive life on this planet from the very beginning of life; to having great relationships, to having abundance as a natural state and occurrence, to having financial freedom, to having a body I can appreciate...everything in life that we chase comes down to one single truth: self love.
After all these years of blaming you for my lack, hating you for who you are and aren’t and what you didn’t do to ensure I reached adulthood with authentic positive self-image, I have finally let go. As much as I believed it served me (it didn’t) and was my right (it wasn’t) to shake my fist and hold you responsible for the pathetic excuse of a woman I believed I was, I have forgiven myself and you.
Thank you for giving me life on this planet and for keeping that life alive long enough so that I could carry on for myself. My journey is my own, and I will take over now. Being alive is enough. I am enough.
Love,
_______
Self Love Rising
Why is this such big news now? Why is it that only recently, articles, books, movies, social media and entire careers have been dedicated to the idea that self love is the root of all things stable and happy—and lack of it causes the opposite to occur?
It is a hard one to answer. The concept of Divine Self-Love has been around as long as humanity. We saw it as “a nice way to be,” a luxury really. No one saw it as the root element and key to positive existence. Perhaps we as humans needed someone to get there first...like running the 4 minute mile or breaking the sound barrier.
Maybe as a collective, we had to reach a certain level of conscious awareness to understand.
I now understand what I never understood before. It’s too late for me to pass this on to my own kids. I never had any. I had such a decided lack of self love in my 20’s and 30’s and such a sour taste for anything ‘family’. I even married a self-proclaimed womanizing bachelor. Imagine my surprise when he announced after the fact, he didn’t want kids. And given my abusive childhood and what I knew about family and lineage, I didn’t let it slow me down or miss even a beat. It never occurred to me that children could be, with the proper awareness, a byproduct as well as a road to self love and ultimately a miraculously changed planet for the better. You cannot see what you cannot see until you are willing to take off the filters through which you see.
But not having children, although often sad for me, has been its own gift. It allowed me to see bigger, reach further, and dig deeper within. It allowed me to close off and go deep without too much interference. Maybe it was a selfish choice. Maybe it was a cowardly choice. But its choosing brought me here, where I am now; speaking to the entire world about things I know that work and helping perhaps to change that world for the better.
The Many Gifts of Self Love
How do we fill the emptiness inside that is always there but can’t quite be explained? How do we end the war that rages deep in our belly or the hopelessness or helplessness we feel—the depression, anxiety, addiction, fear, boredom and lack we experience every day of our lives? How do we get to happy?
And your next thought might be, “Katelyn, I’ve read your articles. It is great that you can quote Einstein, Jesus, Buddha, Eckhart Tolle, Brother David, the Dali Lama and more, but how exactly does self love get me limitless abundance or a great relationship, financial independence or the list of other things I desire in life? If you could do that, my life would be miraculously and forever changed.”
Imagine if your parents taught you from the time you were born, that you are a magnificent and powerful being capable of great things; miracles even. What if they showed you that the gifts you have been given are sacred and that you are sacred; to be honored and respected as your God-Given right. What if your parents taught you how to respect all parts of yourself—from what you put in your body, to what you put into your mind? What if you were taught to honor your body as the temple it is, a great feat of engineering that holds your very essence at its core, and that essence is connected to all things and is the source of infinite knowledge? What if you understood that all you had to do is think of something and it instantly manifested itself as yours? How different would you be? How carefully would you monitor your thoughts and actions? How differently would you treat others? This is a little off track, but given our current state of affairs, I doubt we would have bullies and racism and war and hatred in the world if we were raised with that kind of honor and grace. What would life on this planet be like? Think of the limitless possibilities.
Not until I hit bottom, so hard I almost didn’t survive the impact, did any of this occur to me. And that impact (a story for another day) set me on the road to the Holy Grail: love in its simplest, most basic and most powerful form is love of self...the love from which all else flows. And now you too can go there whenever you are ready. Just ask.
Getting to Self Love
I am certain you have heard the cliches of the moment: “Go within or go without.” “Happiness is an inside job.” And as refrigerator magnet worthy as those expressions are, they are right.
It is that journey, the journey from your head to your heart, that is the path you and I should have been set on as tiny children. But since we weren’t, it is better late than never to get what you seek. Therapy or reading self-help books take years, and results have been proven not only slow, but sporadic at best. What if you could get there quickly?
Step 1: Recognize What Self Love Looks Like
There are so many stories exemplifying the journey to self love. The Wizard of Oz (1939) is perhaps the most notable contemporary and fun story I can think of to help take you there. Even if you’ve seen the movie or read the book a hundred times, I highly recommend you do it again. This time, view the journey for what it truly is: the journey from unconscious living to conscious, of lack to abundance; the sometimes painful and often perilous trip along the road to self discovery and self love. And this time view it from the eyes of a child…with wonder, imagination and astonishment instead of your customary pessimism and Scrooge-like bah-humbug.
Step 2: Create Inner Awareness
By the fact that you are here reading this post, you have already started your journey. Right now, you and your journey are in their infancy. I compare this to riding a train. You can keep moving forward or get off and take a break if the ride gets too painful. You can get back on when you feel ready. What’s important is that your awareness drives you forward, and you are listening to yourself.
Step 3: Commit to Conscious Change
When you start coaching with me, you move from a train to an airplane. Once you get on and buckle your seat belt, you can’t get off until we land. It’s a commitment well worth the risk.
You can go slow or you can go fast. That is entirely up to you. You can simply read my free offerings, and you will eventually be awakened at your own pace.
But if you are ready for quicker results, you can dive in and take the plunge. Drop me an email katelyn@coachkatelyn.com.